3 posts in one night...

Seriously... I currently have an addiction. I might need a recovery program. I do have about 10 other programs I'm in so why not add one to recover from blogging addiction.

I've been reading blogs from AMAZING women that suffer from Endometriosis. Both of the blogs I've been reading within the last 2 hours are women who are married. One is pregnant for the 2nd time. The first was born at 18 weeks and was needed in Heaven more than Earth. She is due with her second in just a few weeks. This is her blog. The next blog I've been reading is a women who since March has been dealing with everything that endo throws at here. This is her blog.

I wish I knew her real name, but Warrior Women, the writer of blog #2, put this in her blog and I TOTALLY agree with her. I seriously almost jumped out of my chair screaming!!!!
"But the thing is, with endometriosis comes this amazing superpower. I think Marvel comics should really think about including this into their collection. When absolutely necessary, those of us with endo can find this incredible strength in us to be as normal as possible. So much so that if you didn't know, there was no way to tell that something was wrong." She was talking about a wedding she went to for a friend in this post. That's just so true. I love knowing that someone else out there gets it. Not that you guys reading this don't get it.... She just understands it more.
In some of her other posts she talks about the Dr's urgency for her to hurry and get pregnant which is really stressful. As I read that I wonder if my Dr really wants me to get pregnant too. I mean yes both GYNs I've been too have brought it up, but do they mean business? Getting pregnant seems so crazy to me right now. I'm not even ANYWHERE near marriage much less kids. I have so much I want to do before then. I don't want to rush into a marriage just so I can pop out some kids. That is the STUPIDEST thing I have ever heard of or thought of in my entire life of living!

So here I am at 4 am Saturday, July 16, 2011 eating strawberries and bananas wondering what the Dr is going to tell me at the end of the month. OOOOHHHH I need to tell you guys something...

I've been going to the chiropractor. I am doing physical therapy and have had a massage the past 2 weeks. However deciding to do this came at a bad time. July looks like this for me...

16-work
17-off
18-Pt then work
19-8 am cardiologist appointment right after work then I work that night
20-Pt then work
21-work meeting after working the night before then I come back at 3 to work some OT (can you say no SLEEP)
22- pt and catch up on sleep
23-staycation and bodybuilding show
24-sleep (YAY!)
25-appointment with a counselor to see if I can find different ways of coping
26 & 27- 2 days of nothing besides Pt!!!!
28-GYN appointment followed by work
29-Pt and Work
30-Work
31-Wow the month is OVER!

Okay so when I write it out day to day it doesn't seem THAT bad to me. Pt 3 times a week. 3 different Dr's. I'm sure that the Cardiologist will want to schedule some testing on my heart because that's the whole point of going! So that will have to be fit in somewhere. Hopefully by the end of the month I will have a lot more answers than I have now.

I don't know if I've said this before or not, but I'm concerned that the birth control that I'm taking is causing my heart to do silly things. If I come off the birth control it will cause me to have issues with my endometriosis. I am having a lot more issues with my endo than I'm willing to admit on this blog. Just like Warrior Women said... You become strong to hide the truth. No one REALLY wants to hear the truth. People don't like to talk about endo because well HELLO it deals with women parts, periods, and sex.

Another thing I know for SURE I haven't been talking much about it me being GLUTEN FREE FOR 30 DAYS!!!!!! Yes I did it! I did eat red vines one day with out checking and of course those are made with wheat flour. Oh and... these veggie chips have wheat in them too. I'm going to continue to be GF until the 23rd when Jamie comes off his diet so we can go to dinner after and seriously PIG OUT! (okay not pig out, but kind of pig out) I really want that DANG piece of bread with butter on it that has been dancing around in my head for the last month! Oh and pizza and a sub sandwich from Fire House Subs!!!!

Apparently at 4 am I feel inclined to share EVERYTHING about me... One more thing... Since my heart issues I haven't been seriously working out. I went to Yoga on Tuesday, but I'm SERIOUSLY itching to get back into the gym. How am I even supposed to maintain my weight if I can't go to the gym? I'm eating healthy still, but I have a low thyroid level (found out in the ER) and that means my body doesn't metabolize fat as easily. The ER Dr. that I LOVE told me he sees that a lot in women with endo. Hmmm that is interesting to me.

I think I've shared enough. I better stop blogging for tonight. I'm sure if I think of something else I'll just blog again! HA!

Thanks again for all the support. I need it now more than ever.